[英文日记] 要如何改才能使整篇日记读起来比较像英文？

     An angel is unnecessarily referring to someone with a pair of wings on its back, nor someone who is able to fly; an angel can be anyone who has lit up my life. Have you ever met any angel in your life? I have.

     She pointed at the white hair above her forehead and said, ‘How dreadful it is! I have no time to dye my hair… this white hair makes me looked older! After being a student, I hardly have time to take care of my appearance.’ I smiled at her, ‘No worries, you are always young at heart.’ She laughed in the way she used to be and said, ‘I am old enough to be your mother, I am 50!’ She took out her identity card from her purse to show me. This is the second last time I met her, in the canteen.

     With her cordial smile, her sincere eye contact, and her peals of laughter, these made me seldom had chance to pay much attention to her appearance. As an enthusiastic person, she brought me a different view of life and a special experience which was precious and unable to read from any books. We had shared wonderful moments for seven months before she left.

     ‘Sorry, I have to go. I am diagnosed with cancer, and I am leaving for treatment.’ she said. Both of us tried not to cry, but I could not control my sadness to stay apart with a nice friend as her. Furthermore, I didn’t know what would happen to her. ‘Be strong!’ was the words which I could utter. No one would have expected that the first time we hugged each other after being friend for several months was under this circumstance. The day she left was in September 2004.

     ‘Hello, my dear! How are you? Long time hasn’t heard from you, I am thinking of you!’ The familiar voice that I heard over the phone last week cheered me. The friendly tone I heard when we first met in February 2004, which was the second day after drawing lots for adoption scheme. With a small piece of paper held in my hand, I clearly saw it wrote ‘Vivian’, name of a person who would become my foster mother, and who eventually becomes a best friend of me.

     ‘Are you Vivian? Oh, you are my foster mother!’ I started with these words when the first time we met. I will never forget such an angel-liked friend in my lifetime. If you ask me what is angel? Have you ever seen an angel? My answer is certainly. I have met an angel on earth, who is with a loving and caring heart.

     An angel is unnecessarily referring to someone with a pair of wings on its back, nor someone who is able to fly… When the time you meet, do cherish.



要如何改才能使整篇日记读起来比较像英文？

[ 本帖最后由 graygrey 于 28-1-2007 11:30 AM 编辑 ]

Summer_kaze

改了一點希望沒改錯吧。

An angel does not unnecessarily refer to someone with a pair of wings, or someone who is able to fly. An angel could be a person who has lifted up another person's life.So far have you ever met an angel in your real life? Yes, I have.

One day, she pointed at her white hair at her forehead and said “How awful it looks! I don’t have the time to dye it. It made me looked older than I am. After being a student, I hardly have the time to take care of my own appearance"

I smiled and say "No worries, you’re still always young at heart" She laughed out in the way she used to be and says ' I'm already older enough to be your mum, I’m 50 right now' She then shown her identity card to me that was taken out from her pause. This was the second last chance I met her in the canteen.

Most of the time her genial smile sincere eye contact and peals of laughter had made me became ignorant to her appearance. As an enthusiastic person, she had taught me different views of life and special lessons that are so invaluable and beyond the knowledge of books. We had shared wonderful moments within the seven months before she left.

"I'm sorry. I’ve to go.To tell you the truth,I’ve been diagonised with cancer, and I'll be leaving soon for a medical therapy.” she said. Both of us had tried not to cry.At that moment,I could not help it but to feel extremely sad as we are going to stay apart from each other and yet she is my very close friend. Furthermore, I might not know what will happen to her next.” Be strong again!" was the only words which I could barely say out. No one has expected the first time we hugged each other was under such circumstance even though we have being friends for all these months. The day she left was during September 2004.

"Hello,my dear! How are you? It has been such a long time since the last time we met. I’m still thinking of you!"
Such an unforgettable voice I heard over the phone last week had actually cheered my day up. This voice that I heard when we first met in Feb 2004 was during the second day after the drawing lots for the adoption scheme. With a small piece of paper held within my finger, I saw it clearly written there "Vivian", the person who soon become my foster mother and indeed eventually became my best friend.

"Are you Vivian?" she asked. "Oh,so you are my new foster mother." I replied her when the first time we met each other. I will never forget such an angel-like friend in my entire life.If you ask me what is an angel? Have you ever met one? My answer is definitely yes. I have met an angel on earth, who has a true loving and caring heart.

Therefore, an angel does not unnecessarily refer to someone with a pair of wings, or someone who is able to fly. When the time you met one, perhaps you do cherish it.


[ 本帖最后由 Summer_kaze 于 15-2-2007 07:58 PM 编辑 ]

ktin_268

我的写法是

当日记是一个人来看待

dear diary,

today i .....

do you know.....

ah......

我用很多第一人称，表情，

用简单的英文来写

chingfong85

我沒有認真地讀拉。。
不過看起來好像是寫給第三者看的。。
好像是寫文章。。

Summer_kaze

原帖由 chingfong85 于 16-2-2007 01:30 AM 发表
我沒有認真地讀拉。。
不過看起來好像是寫給第三者看的。。
好像是寫文章。。

俺想如今沒什麼人選擇執筆在日記本寫得長篇大論﹐自娛自樂吧。
可能是寫在BLOG讓人看吧﹐
寫BLOG最重要就是表達自己的想法﹐自己內心的感受。
可以當它是自己對周遭所發生的事物的看法﹐當時的心情等等。內容無須過於無趣
而且寫法沒有特別的限制﹐文章長短沒有限制﹐也沒有時間限制。
完全由你作主

P/S﹕ 俺希望是可以多多交流﹐因為俺也不確定自己寫得對不對﹐另外鄭重聲明俺的目的也不是要SHOW OFF英文或者拿分數。大家加油咯﹗

[ 本帖最后由 Summer_kaze 于 16-2-2007 02:15 AM 编辑 ]